Pets are a hot topic for some wacky holidays but If Pets Had Thumbs Day is by far one of my favorites. My pets manage to get themselves in trouble without thumbs so I can’t begin to imagine what they would do if they had thumbs! The result of their thumb filled days would have me hiding under beds in hopes that they showed mercy. Who knows what kind of anger they have built up from years of me not giving them that last piece of cake on my birthday. This holiday is a day where we, as pet owners, can reflect on how truly thankful we are that our pets haven’t miraculously sprouted thumbs. But if they did, here are some things I think they would do.
Hitch Hike to the Park
If you find yourself frequently exhausted from work related activities the odds are that your pets are feeling your pain, too. Now they can hitch a ride to their favorite park! With those cute wide eyes, wagging tails and happy demeanors who wouldn’t pick them up for a quick trip to the park?
Use a Can Opener
The smells that come from those delicious wet pet food cans are so enticing for your pet. With easily accessible thumbs, forget feeding your pet dry food. They will take matters into their own hands and seek out the good stuff they know you are hiding.
Open the Fridge
Forget the whole only eating three meals a day thing. Those opposable thumbs open up a world of opportunities for eating! No more waiting for food, pets will open the fridge themselves and pick their own food. Better hope your favorite pizza isn’t what will satisfy your pet’s grumbling tummy.
Use the Computer
Fingers crossed your pets are the best of friends. Otherwise, you just might find the dog discovering EBay and selling the cat.
Clean Up
Let’s be honest, they won’t, but it would be awfully nice of them wouldn’t it?
Text
I frequently speak for my pets in a voice I feel like they might use. Most of the time it’s way higher pitched than they are probably comfortable with. With thumbs, their personalities could shine through their texts. I imagine I would receive lots of messages about squirrels from the dog. Hopefully she would even include some selfies for me to admire while at work.
Dogs Playing Poker
All of those pictures of dogs playing poker would finally hold some truth. They could actually hold the cards!
Thumbs Up
Having the approval of your pets, is there anything better than knowing they think you’re something special, too?
Drive
Dogs would drive to Starbucks for their pupachino, of course!
Selfie
Pets love their hoomans just as much, if not more than their hoomans love them. This is why I think our pets would want to take a selfie to commemorate the day of opposable thumbs.
What do you think your pet would do if they had thumbs?